There are few times in life when we feel quite so awkward as the first day in a new job. You don’t know the people, you don’t know the place and you likely don’t know fully what’s expected of you. Some of us are able to get past that initial uncertainty and embrace new employment, settling in, getting to grips with the work and quickly making friends.
Of course, it doesn’t always go that way. Some of us have such spectacularly bad first days that our new job becomes our previous job in a matter of hours. These redditors have shared stories of times they’ve seen newcomers arrive at their place of work only to be handed their cards in a very short space of time – and as you can imagine, there are some funny, eye-opening tales to be told there.
1. This guy didn’t quite understand what being a mover means
Moving company, Midwest. Most people didnt make it through the first week, they will hire literally anyone who can pass a drug test. Turnover was really bad but i guess thats the nature of the job. I’ll never forget Jeremy. He was 18, did not apply for colleges, so his parents made him get a job.
Jeremy was hired as a mover, as is everyone. He shows up the first day to roll-call in a full suit and tie asking where his desk is. This was a group full of former convicts, high school dropouts, and generally rough dudes trying to make a living. We laughed so hard. Jeremy went right back home. Next day, Jeremy’s mom shows up to give the manager a piece of her mind. We laughed even harder.
2. There’s such a thing as being too honest
New guy drove a forklift into a fire hydrant, in front of a safety rep for the company. His supervisor was called over, and he immediately tells the supervisor that he won’t pass a urine test, as he used his only bottle of clean urine earlier that day when he was hired.
Everybody standing there immediately burst into laughter, which continued as security (also laughing) escorted him off site. Even the supervisor was all smiles… just gave him a pat on the back and wished him the best of luck. It was wild.
3. Domestic drama in the bar
I worked in a bar and a new girl started. At work, she seemed a little rough but was fine. One day [a week into the job] she finished a shift, sat at the bar and ordered a red wine with lemonade and ice in it (not really relevant to the story; just shows she is clearly insane).
Her boyfriend came in, they had a huge domestic in front of my manager and several customers and she threw her drink over her BF and dramatically stormed out.
4. Maybe don’t visit your place of work when you’re ditching
Heard this from a manager I worked with when I worked in fast food. There was this one kid who didn’t show up for work. He ditched work often, so the manager called around, couldn’t get anyone to fill in his shift, so she had to fill it for him.
A few hours into his shift, the dude ditching SHOWS UP, with his friends, and orders food from that manager. She fired him on the spot.
5. Watch your language
First day of work, he walks in, says “what the f*** is up dumba**” to the guy that parked next to (didn’t touch) his new Camaro he bought since he got hired.
The guy was the CEO of the company I used to work for, on visit to our branch. Literally ten minutes into his shift he was signing release papers.
6. Coffee run
I work construction. We had two new hires that were friends starting the same day. The boss told one of them to take a coffee order and come back.
The new hire took everyone’s money and said he needed his friend to go with him cause it was a big order. They never came back.
7. Bus boy bravado
This was a while ago at my old job. New guy gets hired as a bus boy. He was super annoying and tried to insert himself into everyone’s conversation whether they wanted him there or not. It only took a couple of hours for the whole restaurant to hate him.
I was working the bar and he kept eating the bar fruit. I personally didn’t care but the manager did. Manager comes over and tells him to stop eating the fruit. He looks the manager in the eye and eats another piece of fruit.
Manager says “Really?” followed by “Come with me to the office.” New guy promptly replies with “Alright man, calm down. I can tell you got that big d*** energy for a good reason,” followed with cliche wink and nudge from his elbow. In front of me and like 4 other employees. I wanted to slam my face into the ice bin, it was so cringey to witness.
He promptly walked out the front door 10 minutes later without his uniform on anymore. The worst thing about it was the manager was an insanely laid back guy. Hell, the whole restaurant was insanely laid back. You really had to try hard to get fired from this place.
8. Don’t be cavalier with company cash
We had a recent college grad that would use his corporate card for personal purchases. He figured that the company would just keep deducting from his payroll until it was paid off.
He was fired after three months of constant reminders to stop doing it. I don’t think it qualifies as the fastest, because he lasted three months, but it was so idiotic.
9. You can’t always fake it until you make it
I got hired as a long-term temp with one other person to do some basic data entry work… after two or three hours we were introduced to one of the employees in our new department who began going over what we were going to be doing.
None of it seemed overly difficult and I figured that while it was new system I had never used before I’d be able to work it out in a few days as long as I asked questions and took notes. And that was the thing that made me realise that the other person who got hired with me probably lied on her resume and was completely out of her depth. She didn’t take any notes and didn’t ask any questions.
Qhenever I glanced at her I could see flashes of panic on her face. Well, lunchtime came and when we came back she said that another company had called her and offered her a permanent position and she couldn’t work with us any longer.
Both me and the person training us knew what was going on but I’ll give the other lady credit for finding a way out without losing face too badly. The takeaway here is: Yes, “Fake it Until You Make it” can and does work. But you gotta be able to fake it. You can’t fake faking it.
10. Caught stealing seafood
A 19-year-old kid got hired to work the seafood counter at my old job. I saw him twice and then never again, so I asked a coworker what happened.
The kid had closed seafood one night and was walking out of the store, and the five pounds of crab legs he’d stuffed down the back of his pants fell out in front of the closing manager.
11. Don’t talk the talk if you can’t walk the walk[New engineer] was a PhD and really hit it off with the guys in management. Had some female chemists working under his direction, and he was an absolute d***, demeaned their work, blamed them for things not working… He would tell them how to do it and it never worked, he kept blaming them for doing it wrong.
My coworker got fed up and called him on his bulls*** during a big meeting with a prepared presentation describing what they tried, how thoroughly they tried it, why what he proposed would never work, and an alternative solution.
He was p***ed, but the management guys were extremely knowledgeable and started asking him questions, and it was clear he couldn’t answer. Turns out, his wife has a PhD too, and she pretty much did all of his degree work for him…
He knew absolutely nothing. Not only that, but once everyone got to talking, it was clear just how massive an a**hole this guy was. Sadly, my colleagues had to deal with this for months before everything was said and done.
12. No sleeping on the job, especially not on your first day
The IT crew at a large government office worked on a ticket system, meaning that the government workers submitted their problem online and one of the IT guys would pick it up on their end.
The new guy just started his first day, logged into a computer at an empty office, and submitted a “reinstall entire OS” request so he could spend all day there. The manager decided to check in on him before lunch to see how he was doing, and he was completely asleep. Fired before they even finished his hiring paperwork.
13. Demolition men
Spent my summers in college working as a labourer for a construction company. We were doing a bunch of renovation in an active hospital, so noise and dust were a huge concern… Enter these two clowns who show up to do some demolition work. The foreman gives them the talk about how they may be used to doing things a certain way, but this is an active hospital so he’d rather the work take longer than for them to make a huge mess or a lot of noise.
An hour later, we apparently got multiple complaints about the noise and the mess, so the foreman calls me up and says to go over there and clean up NOW, and that he’d be by shortly to see what the hell was going on.
These dudes had dust and broken wall everywhere. I could hear them halfway down the hall, just smashing away without a care in the world. The foreman shows up and we walk into the room to witness this dude standing on a pile of rubble swinging a sledgehammer over his head at a brick wall… Guy wasn’t even wearing a hard hat, apparently oblivious that at any moment that wall might give way and crush him.
The foreman lost his f***ing mind on these guys, kicked them out immediately, and got on the phone with their company and told them he didn’t want to see these guys on site again. Lots of choice four letter words were used, even threatened to fire the subcontractor entirely and get someone else to do the work.
14. Temp troubles
I called a temp agency to get someone to help me count inventory. They sent a guy over with a cast on his arm…. That was my first wtf but I went with it because we were just counting parts.
Then I came back from lunch and this dude was in my office chair zoned out and drooling on himself with a can of air duster in his lap. I kicked him awake and escorted him out of my warehouse. Never used that temp agency again.
15. Who’s the boss?
I owned a construction business and we recently hired three new employees due to expansion. I didn’t get to meet them yet as my business partner was the one who interviewed them and watched them get started on the first day and would check in on them most mornings. Along with the new hired, we promoted one of our best workers to manager to oversee them.
So after a few days, I noticed that we were behind schedule on the job. This wasn’t all that surprising because we had the new hires, but I decided it would be best to go in and check it out to make sure everything was going well. So I call up my manager and tell him to go to a different site (we did multiple sites each day) and that I would take over at the place with the new guys.
Now it is important that at this point I didn’t actually introduce myself [to the workers at the site] and nobody asked who I was, so it seems everyone just assumed that I was just another worker from the company they never met before.
So two hours before we are supposed to finish for the day, a guy comes over and says “Hey, just so you know, we’re all gonna head out now, but clock in that we worked the whole day. [The manager] allows it, and the owners never notice.” So that is the story of how I fired three new hires on the first day I met them… and also how I had to fire our best worker.
16. Bigmouth strikes again
I hired a guy to work for me as quality inspector for merchandise headed to Walmart & Target. He bragged about everything he stole from his last job during training and how they paid him more than I did.
Well, I’m not holding him back from all that money so I had some big guys escort him off the property. His employment lasted about 35 minutes.
17. Grocery grievance
Three hours into his first shift in a grocery store, a guy lost it serving an annoying customer and threw a cabbage at her.
The manager came and told him to go home cause he was finished there. He wasn’t surprised. I was standing next to him, it was an entertaining day.
18. Don’t ask to leave work early then start buying party supplies there
I saw a co-worker get fired within four or so hours. When I was 18 I got a job at a grocery store, along with three others. We all started training together. On the first day we were training in the evening, and one girl asked to go home, she said her head hurt.
They said fine, she clocked out, went to grab a grocery cart and started filling it with beer and liquor. The store manager walked over, and asked her if she was having a party. She said yes. Didn’t even try to come up with an excuse. Just, “yeah, I am, so I needed to leave early on my first day.” basically. He fired her.
19. Vacation vs. vocation
I had a new co-worker scheduled to start in the job. He didn’t show up the first day, second day, or third day. I had to work a double shift for three days straight. Not fun. I answered the phone when he finally ‘called in’ on the fourth day.
He said, “I’m going to be honest with you, I’ve been in Orlando. My parents paid for a small vacation as a reward for getting the job. Would it be okay to start next week instead of this week?”
20. The old ‘Mom was in a car accident’ excuse
This was just a summer job at a fast food place. We had a new girl start and within two days it was apparent she was an idiot and everyone knew that. You could already see the manager questioning his decision.
Then on her third day of work she said she couldn’t come in because her mom was in a car accident and in the hospital. Turns out that’s an easy thing to disprove in a relatively small town.
21. More temp trouble
My document processing clerk was getting married and going on his honeymoon so I got a short-term temp. It wasn’t a temp-to-hire, everything was out in the open through a legit temp agency who generally did pretty good screening.
The temp’s very first day, they show up with a box of things; photos, mugs, office equipment (pen cup, task light, etc.), stuff to decorate a cubicle with. I advised them not to unpack, we were getting right into training.
Within two hours after I cut them loose on a computer with a “Let me know if you need anything or have any questions”, they said, “This mouse is hurting my wrist. It gave me carpal tunnel. I’m going to need worker’s comp paperwork.”
I made an immediate call to the agency ending this contract, then told the temp, “Your paperwork is at the temp agency office, go ahead and go see your rep there.” They left their box of stuff behind; I had to have the temp agency come pick it up.
22. It’s not Bring Your Pet to Work Day
I worked for a small city in LA for many years. I was on the board that interviewed for a new intern for the recreation department. We went through the process, made our choice, made the job offer to a nice, smart girl fresh out of college, she was a little bit of a hippy, casual, relatable, it was fine, all accepted.
The girl showed up with her gigantic pet python wrapped around her neck on the first day. She took ‘casual’ to a whole new level, right back out the door. We hired candidate #2 instead.
23. The hazards of working for your parents
My sister was fired one day one. My dad had his own small medical practice and would hire me and my sisters as our “first job” to be his receptionist and file insurance claims, so we could get some workplace experience before we went job hunting in the larger world. My older sister worked for him in high school for a year.
I worked for him for 2 years, then it came time for my younger sister to take over. I brought her to work to start training and said the number one rule in the office was, “At work he’s not dad, he’s the doctor and the boss.”
She sassed him in front of a patient her first day, with all the venom and sarcasm a teenage girl can muster when dealing with a parent asking her to do something.
He fired her on the spot and I had drag her out of there. Mom told her at least she’d get paid for the couple of hours she managed to be employed.
24. That’s one way to get out of work early
I dunno if this counts as fired or quitting, but I was working at a grocery store, and in the morning we have to unpack the stuff from the truck. Well, this girl was on her second day, and it was her first time unloading the truck.
She asked the manager if she could go out to her car to get something really quick. Long story short, she just drove off in the middle of her shift and never came back for another.
25. Birthday party blues
This happened last week. New girl is hired and right off the bat starts telling me that she regrets taking this job (despite being unemployed for four months) because there are so many new people so it must be a bad job because high turnover. (Not really true. We just got bought by a large company and they are hiring more people because we have more business.)
She tells us all about how it’s her birthday and she’s going drinking after work. Does a no-call, no-show the next day, which is her third day.
We all assume she quit. But the next day she comes in and starts just trying to work like nothing happened. The supervisor asked what happened and she said she got in a minor car accident. He asked why she didn’t call and she said she doesn’t have a cell phone – despite being on her cell phone constantly in the office.
He decided to give her one more chance but gave her a lecture about how she needs to communicate properly about missing work, and one more incident will be an automatic firing. Next day: no-call, no-show.
26. Not such a bright spark
We had a new guy come in, go through all of the training on starting in our factory, lock out tag out and all of that stuff. Said he was an electrician. Then the very first job he was asked to do, he was found working on a machine with the power locked on. There are so many things wrong with that in an industrial setting, it’s unbelievable.
My boss pulled him out of the machine, said “You’re too stupid to work here.” and walked him out of the building. I think he was an actual employee there for 3 days at that point and this was his first day actually on the production floor and not in training.
27. Animal carers shouldn’t throw kittens
One and a half hours into shift as an animal care worker, I was showing my trainee how to clean the kitten rooms and started him on the easiest cage. We’re talking neonatal, six day old bottle feeder kittens.
I explained how to set up the kennel, clean them up, etc. I turned around to grab some towels and a fresh hot water bottle when I heard a thump. And then another thump.
I turned around and the trainee was tossing the kittens to the other side of the kennel to move them. Like, underhand lobbing a softball, just tossed three kittens out of his way. I freaked out and yanked him down to the supervisor’s office.
His excuse was the kittens were ‘attacking’ him, and he felt threatened? So he threw them! No warnings, fired on the spot. (The kittens all were fine and got adopted out a few months later.)
28. Must love dogs
I worked at a Doggie Day Care. For group play dogs were put in rooms according to size and we would rotate through the rooms during our shifts.
They hired a new girl and on her first day she went into the big dog room and cried hysterically because she was afraid of them. I don’t think she made it two hours.
29. Sometimes you wonder how they even got hired to begin with
A co-worker got fired in I think two days. He destroyed some product, but said it wasn’t him; the boss give him a order, but he took a walk through the warehouse instead; and he got caught two times smoking outside (it’s not allowed, we’re a food company and have a room for smoking).
He was also suspected of stealing, but there was no evidence. This all happened before our supervisor caught him the second time smoking outside and then fired him.
30. No room for racism in the workplace
I had a co-worker get fired halfway through his first day. He was a well-qualified sales rep with plenty of industry experience and seemed cordial enough, but he got fired on his lunch break. Management and HR took him to lunch and he made racist jokes about several ethnicities.
He was going to be the rep for our El Paso market, which is incredibly diverse, so he was told not to even bother coming back from his lunch break.
31. Don’t go thinking you run the place on day one
I was in IT and processed a new colleague’s account creation during a night shift. The next week I had evening shift and he got his credentials. The new guy proceeded to get in our faces because not all accesses he needed were granted yet (this was out of our hands as his manager needed to approve them).
Then he decided to loop in our bosses, our bosses’ bosses, and the board of the company, with all the fury of a middle manager scorned.
The next day I processed his account removal. Normally they gave a two week grace period until the account was completely deleted. They fast-tracked his account deletion. Time active in our system: less than 24h.
32. Don’t give all your freebies to your friends
A guy at the supermarket got this cool customer service position, and part of it was handing out coupons for hotdogs for dissatisfied customers.
He decides to hand them out to all his friends from school, and they all show up at lunch break the next day to claim their free hotdogs. He only had the job for a week.
33. Too big a job to handle
I worked in the signage industry for many years. One day some guy walks in looking for work claiming to be a sign writer. My boss asks him if he has brushes, he says absolutely. So my boss says okay, we need someone to go and paint a five metre logo on the wall at the gym… Pretty basic stuff. We give him the layout and the paint and off the guy goes.
Four or five hours later we get a call from the owner of the gym. He tells my boss to come and fetch this guy before he has some kind of breakdown inside the gym.
We get there and he has literally got two tiny little artist’s brushes. A number one and a number four or something, and he is trying to freehand this 5m circle with them. I almost cracked a rib trying not to laugh at this guy. He was sweating bullets trying to get this done.
No mahl stick, no tape, no chalk line. Not even a normal two inch paintbrush. Just this little 4mm round paintbrush and he’s painting this 50mm thick circle by eye. Holy s*** we laughed about that for days.
34. Probably best not to tell everyone in the office how bored you are
This one woman was in and out within two weeks. She was a little abrasive, but seemed smart enough. Then she started complaining to the guy sitting next to her that the work was so boring.
She proceeded to tell him how she was just watching TV all day, and not even reading the stuff she was supposed to be working on, just writing whatever she felt like. He told management, and she was gone a few days later.
35. Don’t be in too great a hurry to get into uniform
Co-worker’s first day at McDonald’s. While walking through the kitchen, the manager handed him his uniform. He stopped dead in his tracks in the middle of the kitchen and stripped down to his underwear to change into the uniform. First the shirt, then the pants.
He was fired by the manager who had handed him the uniform before he stepped out of his pants. It was the only time I’ve seen someone fired publicly. All of the crew members and anyone waiting in line to order food saw this happen within about 90 seconds.
36. Indoor voice, please
At first the new guy looked normal. Then sometime around lunch time he suddenly screamed at the top of his lungs – right there in the office.
When people run to him to see what’s going on he told them, “I was trying to see how loud i can scream”. He was gone before his scream’s echos stopped.
37. Bad boy behaviour catches up with you
Guy got hired and was filling out paperwork in the lobby on his first day. Before he could finish the paperwork, the hiring manager came out and told him the offer had been rescinded.
Turns out a current employee noticed the new guy in the lobby and told the hiring manager, “If he stays, I’m going to quit. That guy slept with my wife about a month ago.”
38. Don’t over-estimate your own strength
I worked at a swimming pool store in college. Part of the job was to bring the chemicals/filter sand/pools salt/etc out to the customer’s vehicle. The sand bags were like 50 lbs (22.6 kg), the salt bags were like 40 lbs (18.1 kg).
We needed another set of hands to help out around the store… My boss let the recruiter know that we had a preference for anyone, male or female obviously, who could handle a little heavy lifting. They found us a match and ensured that she could handle all the responsibilities that we wanted.
The next day, the new worker who walks through the door is about 5′ 5″ (165 cm), and 110lbs, maybe 115 soaking wet. And she was wearing fuzzy slippers (we work in a warehouse of heavy objects!) I’m not one to judge off appearances alone, but I was skeptical… so when a customer comes in to get some salt for their pool, I put her to the test and asked if she could load up two bags and bring it out to the car.
After three minutes of what should have been 30 seconds’ work, I walked out into the warehouse and she was struggling to even get the bag off the ground. She was gone 30 minutes later, after a total of an hour and half of work. And my boss told us SHE was the one who said that the heavy lifting was no problem.
39. Cops called on trainee from hell
Food service job: a new employee comes in smelling of alcohol. He grabs some food, without putting in an order for it, right in front of everyone, including one manager. He asks one of the servers where the takeout silverware is. Server redirects him to me, the host, since takeout stuff is part of my duties, not the servers’.
I show him the silverware, he starts grumbling, and then returns to the server and gets on their case about why the hell didn’t they tell him where it is. This escalates to a fight that cumulates in him getting tackled to the floor by the manager and the cops being called.
Turns out, that wasn’t the first time he’s shown that kind of behaviour. The day before he mouthed off at the General Manager after she instructed him to take out the trash, insisting that it wasn’t part of his job (it was).
He later said that he didn’t know she was the GM, despite her shiny, golden (as opposed to the normal white) name tag with “General Manager” written on it. We never saw him again after the fight. He had been there only two or three days at most, and was still in training for the position he was hired for.
40. Cyber-security no-nos
I worked at a high security workspace for a while. Under no circumstance could you take photographs anywhere inside the building and you were strongly discouraged to post on social media about where you worked. (Something to do with the competition finding things out.)
So this guy took a picture of his employee pass on his first day and posted it on his Facebook talking about how happy he was with his new job. Work found out (I think his FB wasn’t even set on private). He was gone quite quickly after that.
41. Bye-bye, bigot
I helped run a writing centre in a university in the US. Student worker gets hired, comes to orientation, starts training to be a face to face writing consultant.
During the whole hiring process, we emphasised that we worked with a lot of different kinds of people, and with a lot of international students from all over the world. She nods, smiles, says all the right things. We hire her.
Day one, she shadows my coworker on a face to face consultation with an international student from Saudi Arabia, a really friendly woman getting a master’s degree in electrical engineering, who wore a face covering in mixed-gender settings.
After the consultation, we do the normal debrief with the new hire, and she says, “those people just make me so uncomfortable. Can we make it so I don’t have to work with people like that?” Yup. We sure can. Bye.
42. Sexual harassment + flat-earth conspiracy theories = fired
I pretty much got a guy fired within three days. I am the only female on the shop floor and at the time the youngest team member by around 15/20 years. At the time I was 19 and this guy who was 40 had just started. I instantly got a bad feeling when he just would not stop staring at me (several co-workers mentioned it to me), as well as asking personal questions within ten minutes of meeting me.
Anyway, I could not get over this creepy vibe no matter what. It did not help that the guy kept screaming about conspiracy theories. (Did you know there is apparently an ice wall surrounding the flat earth and there are special “guards” with lasers that will shoot on sight?)
…By the second day, the guy waited till we were alone and started saying “you’re not like other girls, you’re so nice and perfect and you would make an amazing wife,” in a very creepy tone. Cut to a few hours later the guy is shouting about how his current girlfriend is useless and a b***h and how much he hates her to the rest of the team on break.
By the third day, the guy starts screaming about his conspiracy theories again on break but starts acting aggressive towards those who question him. After break, another supervisor asks why I’m laughing and I quote what the guy said. Long story short, the guy lasted another three hours before he was told he would not be coming back the next day.
43. Telemarketing trickery
I took a temp job for a two week period where I literally saw hundreds of these! The contract, I later found out, was a “telemarketing company” run by a shady lawyer that found a technically legal way to commit fraud and was exploiting it as fast as he could to make bank before the loophole got closed.
This meant it was exceedingly easy for a new hire to say something which would constitute “actual fraud” completely by accident. How easy could that be? One use of the word “we” on a phone call was instant cause for dismissal.
I showed up on the first day with 30 other people. They brought us into a conference room and we were told we were all hired and would start work that day… but that more than two thirds of us would be fired that day.
15 minutes to practice the extremely short script, a 45 minute lecture on the things you must never ever say while closing, and 30 minutes to practice our closing and we were on the phones. He undersold it, three quarters of us were fired easy. Same as the next day and every day thereafter.
44. Big lies will get found out
I started a job once and on the first day during the induction we had to say a few things about us another new starter told us all that she lives with her boyfriend and named him (an Olympic level athlete who was relatively unknown but did represent our country at Olympic level). Someone googled him and found he was married with kids and lived at the other end of the country.
The manager took her to one side and asked why she lied and she didn’t have an answer so he fired her there and then. To this day I still don’t know what to think about it. Was that a firing offence? It feels a bit harsh, but equally I cannot fathom why someone would lie like that so quickly and what that might mean they are capable of.
45. Don’t play video games at your desk on your first day
It was my first job I had just started in a company doing basic data entry. On the first day one of the other new guys brings his personal laptop in and plays some video game whenever the managers aren’t around.
Unluckily for him, the CEO just happened to walk by and he saw the guy playing. He saw the CEO see him and put the laptop in his drawer and the CEO continued walking.
A few minutes later my manager comes by and asks to see the guy. I never saw him again and just saw an HR person come get his stuff.
I honestly wasn’t sure what that guy was doing until another coworker who sat right next to him told us. I was like who does that on their first day, especially when you sit in a highly trafficked area. This was in the middle of the recession when it was hard to get even a basic job.
46. ‘Bottery Farn’
I used to work at a store that rhymes with Bottery Farn and my manager was hiring folks to work the stock room for the holidays. A young man interviewed for the job and he dressed very casually for the interview. My manager hired him, but stressed that he wouldn’t be allowed to wear shorts or casual clothes.
Bottery Farn has a bit of a more formal dress code, even for the folks that work in the back. The guy shows up on the first day wearing Cookie Monster pajama pants. My manager didn’t let him clock in.
- Credit: Depop/FrumpkinPumkin
47. Overconfidence is not a virtue
Let’s call the guy, F, for Forgot because I don’t remember his name. We had a group orientation our first week at a new job. First day there is a blizzard, it wasn’t a surprise we all knew it was coming so we all plan accordingly and are all 5-10 minutes late. Even our boss was 15 minutes late. F shows up 2 hours late…
Later, F is constantly interrupting the presentation since he worked with a similar company previously and he felt he knew everything. In between his interruptions he kept constantly needing to go to the bathroom. We are taken out to lunch, where F makes everything about him and belittles the female moderators who took us to lunch.
After lunch we have individual training on our computers that will take a couple hours, F falls asleep. Moderator wakes F up and he can’t focus on any of the tasks; he yells at her that it’s nonsense and there’s no way she’d be able to do it… F continues to yell and is escorted out. When another employee comes to get his things for him, they open his water bottle and it stinks of booze. He’s fired that afternoon.
The next day, Day 2, our boss tells those of us who were early how F called him the night before crying and arguing that he did nothing wrong. Shortly after telling us this story, F shows up! He has no memory of the previous day or more importantly being fired! He again is escorted out.
48. Keep your personal drama out of the workplace
I started a few weeks before this one girl. So, we were both doing side by side training with other employees. On her first day, she kept getting up to take a personal call. She’d come back, slam-sit in her chair and huff, then go back to training.
When lunch time came, I went out the front and found her screaming into her phone, making wild gestures, and cussing.
Not only was this witnessed by anyone going in or out of the building, but the office for our HR Director was literally right there next to the door. With big huge windows pointing right out into the sidewalk this girl was doing some weird rage dance on.
She didn’t come back after lunch and I heard the next day that a ton of people, like me, saw her and others heard her from within the building. So, she was let go.
49. A whole new meaning to ‘naughty nurse’
I saw someone fired in a matter of minutes, in an operating room as a medical student. An elderly patient, starting to come out of the anaesthesia: “Did I die?” The OR nurse, leaning over him, replies, “Yes honey, and I’m your guardian angel!”
OR nurse then turns around to realise the charge nurse was standing behind them, and says, “I’m fired, aren’t I?” Charge Nurse replies, “Oh, yeah.”
50. Beat the competition by staying awake at work
At an old Help Desk position, the company would hire two temps on probation and then keep one after a month. I started work and was up against a guy with very little social skills. He wasn’t more technical than I was either.
So, I knew I just had to do good work and get in good with the other coworkers and I should be golden. Well, that isn’t how it went down.
On the third day, I hear snoring behind me. I turn and see the other guy, head back, asleep and snoring in his chair. I was about to wake him up, but thought to just see how this plays out. The other co-workers slowly started to notice the snoring as well. Nice.
But better yet, the IT Director walked over, looked at him asleep, looked at all of us in bewilderment, turned around and walked out. My new co-worker buddy looked at me and said, “Welcome to the team.”